Here are helpful steps you can follow to handle situations like this with friends who are eager to exploit you.
Yes, we understand. Friendship shouldn’t always be about what you can get. There’ll be times you should give too, and happily so. But you must also understand the thin line between giving in friendship and being exploited.
Now and then, we meet that one friend who seems always to be taking your time, your money, your energy, while offering very little in return. Such friends can easily leave you feeling drained, used, or manipulated.
If you are in this situation, it’s time to tell yourself the truth. Such friendships will never benefit you. But what can you do?
Here are helpful steps you can follow to handle situations like this, with friends, who are eager to exploit you.
Let’s face it – not all exploitations are clear and visible. Sometimes, it can be hard to notice, especially by the exploited person. That’s why psychologists often recommend that the first step to dealing with an exploiter is to recognise that you’re being exploited in the first place. Look out for traits like:
Always needing help but never showing up for you, even when you’re not necessarily looking for financial help
Borrowing money and never paying back
Only calling or checking up on you when they need something.
You’re probably being exploited if you ever notice yourself in a give-and-take situation.
Set Clear Boundaries
Now that you suspect exploitation, it’s time to take action. One of the first things to do is to draw lines that shouldn’t be crossed. Politely but firmly say “No” when their requests feel too much.
You don’t owe anyone constant access to your time or resources, especially when it’s costing your peace or not being reciprocated. Well, if they’re not understanding your boundaries or the need for them, there’s probably no need to be friends with them in the first place.
Have the Difficult Conversation
Avoiding it may prolong the damage. Talk to your friend calmly and express how you feel. Pick your words carefully so it doesn’t seem like you’re directly accusing them. Instead, make it clear this is your feeling. For example, “I feel like I’m the only one giving in this relationship.”
This way, you’ve politely called their attention to a perceived problem. It’s even possible they don’t understand the impact of their behaviour. But by calling them to it, you’ve helped them see a behaviour they should work towards dropping.
Watch Their Reaction
A true friend will reflect, apologise, or at least listen. But if they get defensive, dismissive, or angry, that tells you everything. It shows that exploitation and toxicity are in their nature. Remember, friendships should grow through communication, not collapse under accountability.
Conclusion
You deserve friends who see you, value you, and respect your boundaries. Exploitative friendships chip away at your self-esteem and peace of mind. If it feels one-sided, it probably is. Be bold enough to protect your space. Your well-being is worth it.